Monthly Archives: December 2014
How a spray changed our relation for the better!
In addition to having an awesome name, the “Stud 100 Spray for Men” is also far and away the best desensitizing spray money can buy. “The Stud 100,” just the name itself gives me confidence. Sex would often be an embarrassing challenge for me, but not anymore. With the Stud 100 spray, it doesn’t matter how hot she is, how young she is, how freaky she is – I can outlast her and leave her begging for more. Not sure if this product if for you? Answer these following questions?
- Are you a hair trigger?
- Do you blow your load before your partner does?
- Do you ever feel the need to masturbate BEFORE you have sex so you will last longer?
- Have you ever been embarrassed by your inability to perform?
If you answered yes to even one of these questions, Stud 100 spray is the answer to your prayers. Don’t ever fear sex again! There is a solution to what ails you, and its name is the Stud 100. But what’s that you ask? Why should I care who comes first? Isn’t the whole point of sex to get off? Well, maybe… if you only plan to bang whores for the rest of your life! Who raised you, rabid wolves? It’s time to get with the program.
Look, if you’re serious about having a serious relationship, or even being taken seriously by any woman ever again, you’ve got to understand that with great sex comes great responsibility. You have a sacred duty, a responsibility to make your woman come. That’s the real payoff in sex – the satisfaction of a job well done. There’s nothing quite like seeing a naked woman, back arched in the throes of ecstasy, all because you know how to work the cock. Your orgasm is a bonus, but it’s not the true objective. If this has ever been a difficulty for you, you need to try the Stud 100 spray. Lots of problems in this world can’t be solved, but this isn’t one of them.
Reality check: Porn has lied to you. Yes, I know. It’s a shock. When I was a kid, there was no internet. There was only VHS and my junior high buddy Dean who sold me my first XXX sex video when I was 13. I remember the scenario. Pizza guy shows up at the sorority house. He’s sorry he’s late. That’s okay, the blonde says, my girlfriends and I were just about to have a blow job contest, and we need a young stud like you to judge. And then the Pizza guy produces this massive erection which three gorgeous women then spend the next 42 minutes sucking and fucking until Pizza guy has ravaged all three and hosed them down with his massive unit.
Talk about bad information! It had me thinking that any man could hold out for damn near an hour while servicing three porn stars. That’s just crap. Then again, it did make me want to attend college, so the experience was not a total loss. But there is not a man walking this Earth who could actually do what that Pizza guy did. At least, not in one take. Although, now that I think about it, if he had the Stud 100, it might have been possible. This stuff is that good.
But for the normal guy, porn is not just fiction – it’s science fiction. There’s just no way the average man could ever endure something like that without ejaculating at least 17 times. That sounds fun and all, but after pop number 2, it starts to hurt! In the real world, the average man can last somewhere between 2-4 minutes. That’s great when you’re paying for lap dances by the song at the local strip joint, but it presents a clear logistical challenge during real, actual love making, where your reputation as a lover is at stake. And women, by contrast, can hold out indefinitely! It’s quite a challenge when you think about it. Fortunately, the Stud 100 provides you with an easy, cost-effective solution.
Here’s how The Stud 100 spray works. It’s a Pre-measured pump spray with an active ingredient called Lidocaine, which temporarily desensitizes your penis so you can last longer. I know that sounds vaguely medical, but don’t worry. First, it doesn’t last all that long – perhaps an hour or so. Second, it doesn’t take the pleasure out of sex. If anything, it makes sex better because remember, good sex is about pleasing your partner, not just pleasing yourself. And trust me, not only will you be able to please her with the Stud 100 spray, but your own orgasm will be so much more powerful because you will have EARNED it. Here, check out this link to an actual customer review of Stud 100 in action.
There’s nothing quite like coming when you’re secure in the knowledge that you’ve done your job right. All you have to do is get hard, mist your hard cock with the Stud 100, gently massage it in with your fingers, and go do what you were born to do. Don’t like misting your own penis? Have her do it. There’s no reason you can’t make the Stud 100 spray an integral part of your lovemaking routine.
Most of our customers are accustomed to our fast and quick deliveries but they are puzzled why they have not received their package as fast as they used to.
The reason is that during holiday season USPS, which is the carrier we use for free shipping, gets really busy since there are millions of packages being delivered for Christmas. USPS prioritizes their USPS Priority and USPS Expedited Priority mail to their First Class Mail during the holiday season.
Our average delivery time-frame for free shipping packages is 4 to 8 business days. During the holiday season the time-frame changes to 6 to 10 business days. Delivery date for Priority Main changes from 2 to 4 business days to 4 to 6 business days.
These delays are really beyond our control and as always we ship all the orders that are placed by 3:00pm PST. If you have plans and need the package to be there on a certain date, please choose UPS or FedEx.
Please note that Priority Mail is NOT guaranteed. UPS and FedEx also do NOT deliver on Saturdays and Sundays. If you have placed your order after 3:00pm PST, there is little chance that it would be shipped same day and it may be shipped the next business day.
H20 Flavored Personal Lubricants are the kind of product that make you get down on your knees and thank God that people in white lab coats invent things for sex. If heaven had a vaginal wall, it would be lined with System Jo lubricants. It literally makes my girlfriend hunger for my penis. Literally! As in, her stomach starts to growl a bit when I lube myself up. But before I get into the nitty-gritty of why their lube, I would say that System Jo lubricants have various flavors and for the sake of keeping it simple, I’ll talk about one of my girlfriend’s favorite flavor. The Red Licorice flavor is the bomb, let me tell you a bit about it’s make up, in case you’re allergic to things that will make your junk fall off.
First, its water based, which means you can use it with a condom. I personally don’t use condoms, as I’m in a monogamous relationship, but it is my understanding that you can actually lube up the condom after you place it on your engorged member, and it makes the latex taste like… well, licorice. I guess most men don’t really know what condoms taste like, but I hear it’s like licking an old shoe. This is important to know if you’re a dude. A woman may want to blow you, but no matter how hot she is for you, nobody wants to lick an old shoe. Google this. You will find no information on women licking old shoes.
Enter the System Jo lubricant H2O Red Licorice Flavored (pun intended)! Water based and gluten free. I eat nachos for breakfast, so I personally don’t give a damn about gluten, but I read articles about women (ok, I skim my Facebook newsfeed) and apparently gluten free is now a thing. The point is, System Jo Lubricants H20 doesn’t have any. So, if you’re ever negotiating sex with your wife, this is a selling point. Knowledge is power, friends. Gluten free, water based, and no artificial sweeteners! The competing brands use the same artificial crap they use to sweeten Diet Pepsi, and who wants to fellate a Diet Pepsi? I know I don’t, and neither does your woman. Treat her all fancy and give her the top shelf lubricant. She will thank you. And when she’s done, you will really, really thank her!
Now, at this point I’m gonna get a little blue, because this stuff is really designed for oral sex, and I don’t know how to sound like a college professor and explain what it’s like to get blown when this stuff is all slippery on your balls. What I did to educate myself was, I interviewed my girlfriend after we had sex for the first time with the H20 Red Licorice. I didn’t have a mike or anything, but I did take notes. Rather than quote her verbatim, let me paraphrase what she told me. Before Big Red came into our lives, she saw oral sex as something akin to a job requirement. She wasn’t wild about it, but it was part of the deal. I guess I always figured this, because when I watched her go down on me, it looked like she was distracted, like she was thinking of kittens or her tax return or something, anything to distract her from the taste.
I was shocked to learn the following: as much as we men think our dicks are fantastic, apparently they don’t taste good. Especially if you have to wear a condom, and especially after you’ve been having sex for more than thirty seconds. You get what she calls the “man funk” working down there, which I gather is unpleasant. My girlfriend used the word “bio-hazard.”
The Jo H20 Red Licorice solves this problem in a way that is as simple as it is genius. Not only does it make your dick taste great, it smells good too! So with just a simple dime sized application of this manna from heaven, my girlfriend went from seeing oral sex as a hassle to a special treat! My God, it makes me teary eyed. And because it tastes good, she’s inclined to keep doing it, on account of the taste and the smell. All you have to do is lie back and let her do her thing. I think about zombies. That’s just me, though. Because it’s so good I don’t want to come until I absolutely have to. The blow job, that is. Not zombies. Though they’re cool, too.
Also, you can masturbate with it. While the taste and smell aren’t really all that important when you’re making sweet, sweet self-love, the water based lube means this stuff last forever. Nothing I hate more than having to stop mid jack to reapply lube. Talk about a mood killer. With Jo H20 lubes, you just lube up your hand and go to town, relaxed in the knowledge that your penis will run out of semen long before your hand gets dry.
Insider’s tip for System Jo Lubricants:
Use your left hand (if you’re right handed) and stroke with your palm facing down. Totally feels like someone else is doing it. Pro tip: Twist your cock a little while you go up and down for extra sensory ba-ga-ga-ga. Don’t know how else to explain it. It’s ba-ga-ga-ga-ga –ga BLAM!
Finally, Red Licorice is cheaper than the crap you can buy at the local pharmacy. It lasts longer, feels better, and costs less. Oh how I love technology. Your girl will love it because it tastes considerably better than your unflavored dick, and you will love it because if your girlfriend is having a good time, you can bet your bottom dollar that you’ll have a good time too. And if you happen to get into a fight or something, just borrow the lube, and use it yourself. You literally can’t go wrong with this stuff.
5 stars all around. System Jo H20, thank you for being you. Keep it coming. I know I will!
PS: Don't forget, I was just talking about Red Licorice, Jo has a lot of flavors such as chocolate, cherry, banana, mint, vanilla, and the sort!